Happy Mother's Day, Jackie

Staying in a relationship for 30 years is a pretty long time by today’s standards. It seems today that a relationship, that is a marriage, doesn’t last much longer than a package of disposable razors.  And, I suspect that most marriages today sort of forget about all that to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer junk that seems paramount in the old school marriage vows, but today just seem to be part of the recycle routine.

Tired of your spouse? Just dump him or her in the big green vessel and a truck comes by and takes him or her away every other Friday.  Heck, if you leave them curbside some poor misbegotten scrapper may even pick them up.

But even so, some marriages just have staying power.  I would like to say that some relationships are the cuddly kind.  All sweetness and sap, what my mother used to call Saccharin sweet.  For those who don’t remember, Saccharin was an early artificial sweetener that really overplayed its hand.  It was beyond sweet.  When my mother used the term it was for someone who was way too sweet to be a real person.  You know the kind of person who for one reason or another insists on being all sweet and light and lovey-dovey.  The kind that makes you wonder if they are not really just putting up a façade to hide the serial killer they really are.

I’ve never really been that snuggly kind of person.  You know the one that needs constant close attention from their significant other.  Perhaps it’s just the time I spent on my own, not having to deal with anything other than myself and my own problems.  Nobody ever took much time to cuddle with me, and I wouldn’t have allowed it anyway.

So what does this have to do with the price of tears in heaven, you might ask?  Well, for those of you who have not seen Guardians of the Galaxy part 2, this probably won’t ruin the plot. But while watching that show Sunday afternoon, I realized that my alter ego was playing a part on the screen.

All things taken together, to me there is no doubt that they based this character’s disposition on me.  Had I only known in time enough I might have been able to get a cut of the cinematic pie and be rich beyond my dreams. Move over Publisher’s Clearing House, here I come.

But then, it’s probably a little hard to put a price on an attitude.  And it came to me in a rush, in a joke actually, when Drax told Mantis it would be okay to pet his dog, Rocket.

So at this point, I have probably lost everyone who reads this, well everyone who has never seen either of the Galaxy movies (shame on you).  So, for those who don’t get the idea, Rocket is a raccoon-based genetically and mechanically engineered critter.  The very last thing in the world someone should try to do with him is pet him or cuddle with him.  He is much more fond of explosives and large futuristic guns.  Oh yeah!, to quote Rocket.

So with that realization, you know that in some ways Rocket’s character was derived from me, I have a new understanding of just how fortunate I was to grab a wife like Jackie when the time came around.  At times, even a crotchety old goat like me gets a turn on the merry go round and selects the golden ring.

So my dear, for all those times past and future, when you really really really needed a hug, and I just wasn’t a hugger, this one is for you.  And for all of you other Mother’s out there, hope you have a great Mother’s Day too.